Today was one of those days where I really felt the absence of having a buyer’s agent assisting me with the home buying process.

Every other time I’ve bought a house, I had an exact location picked out (thanks to the US Government and military orders!). I’d find the best realtor in the region and ask them to block out their schedule for a week and line up houses for us to see. Then we’d fly over from where we were living and they’d drive us from house to house. Afterward, they’d help us assess our options and put in an offer. 

This is not how anything works in France!

I’ll go into more detail on a future post, but basically, you’re on your own. Even though there are few websites that aggregate the listings, here’s no Multiple Listing Service (MLS) where you can view everything on the market. Additionally, France does not have buyer’s agents like we do in the United States. I’ll caveat this by saying that there are a few agents who offer a service like this, but it’s certainly not free. For the most part, it’s up to you to reach out to the listing agents to schedule a viewing for any house that catches your eye, or to let them know what you’re looking for. But finding houses you want to see is only half the battle. The other half is making it to France and coordinating the logistics, like where you’ll stay and which homes to visit in what order. 

So as I was plotting out the first visit of the day, I became frustrated when I realized we’d have to back track a bit to get to the house. It didn’t look far from Nîmes on the map, but in fact, it was an hour’s drive away. And the backtracking meant we’d be even further from the second house. Ugh, more driving! 

We got to the property I’d nicknamed “the woodsy pool house” exactly at 10. It was the first time we’d be meeting a realtor who would show it to us. 

Like the others, I came across this house on Facebook as well. After having a chat with the owner via Messenger, he put me in touch with the realtor. 

Now, this is one of those situations where the photos and the description really made the place look and sound better than it was. There was a separate apartment, but in reality it was a basement flat with speckled blue garage floor paint everywhere. And speaking of the basement, the stairs were treacherous. Not only were they abnormally steep and high, but when you opened the door, there was an instant drop. This made it hard to open the door if you were coming up the stairs because you were so much lower than usual. Then there were whole walls covered in murals and a strange flow to the floorplan that had me scratching my head. And if I was scratching my head, Jen’s head must have been exploding because she’s an interior designer!

In this case, I was grateful we were seeing it with a realtor instead of an owner because it was so much easier to pull the “k, thanks…bye!” and run out the door. “Maybe I’ll hear from you about taking another look sometime?” he asked. 

Hmmm…how to answer this honestly but with tact?  

“Actually…we have another house that is a better contender.” 

And that was it. 

Safely in the car with the windows rolled up, Jen was like “what did you see in that place?!” 

I welcomed her honesty. Personally, I wish we would have just skipped it and lounged about more in Nîmes!! It was refreshing to have someone else to debrief with who had a very similar appreciation for beauty and style. On the contrary, Ralph could be happy with any house with a roof and four walls within walking distance of shops and restaurants. But Jen had discernment…and after each visit we could let loose and reflect on what we’d learned.

Stepping back to look at the bigger picture of what we were learning about the house hunting experience, there were other takeways. Like what a jolt to go from seeing two very old, very well-proportioned houses to this newer build from the 1980s that felt like it was falling apart. I was already leaning towards older homes for the charm and quality, but this experience sealed the deal. Jen agreed. 

Meanwhile, the next house was in a bastide town called Ansouis, about a two-hour drive away. Coincidentally, it was another house built in the 80s…so would it be just as disappointing? We hoped not! We had about 4 hours to make it to our 3 pm appointment, which seemed to be plenty of time to gas up and get a bit of lunch beforehand. 

At around 13:00, we arrived at the Ansouis house. It was at the base of the hill leading up to the actual town nestled on the rocky outcropping. And blessedly, there was time to explore and grab a bite before meeting with the owner.

Of course, the first restaurant (the one with the best reviews) was “complet.” Ya know, because we arrived with no reservation at 13:00 and not 12:30, haha. So we ventured over to the local pub, which offered outdoor seating and honestly, a delightful lunch special for about €17. With quick and efficient service, we still had time left over to explore the narrow streets of this bastide town. The October air was chilly, but the stone houses and passageways had soaked up the warmth of the sun. I’d never heard of Ansouis before this, but it was well-located near Avignon and Aix-in-Provence, nestled in between farmland. By this time of year, the tourists were gone and most of the shops and galleries were closed. It almost felt like we had the place to ourselves! 

After about 30 minutes of wandering, we still had some time to explore so we hit the country road to check out a nearby town called Lourmarin. I had no idea what to expect, but it was the cutest artsy enclave! With no time to shop or linger, I snapped a few pics here and there to remind myself to come back one day. 

Then it was time for our appointment. Coming from the other direction, we noticed that the house was right next to a winery. That seemed like a bonus until we stepped outside and got smacked in the face with the strong scent of manure and decomposing grape skins! In my search, I had seen listings bragging about locations having “no olfactory disturbances” and now I finally understood what they were talking about. For such a gorgeous spot, this was definitely an issue to take into consideration. 

This house was at the top of the budget, so I was already a bit wary. It would have to be something really special to justify the expense. But after just a few minutes of glancing around, I realized it didn’t have that “je ne sais quoi.” Except I knew what it was missing. Charm. Character. High ceilings. A feeling of spaciousness. Don’t get me wrong – it was a nicely done contemporary home, but it was never going to steal my heart! 

The layout wasn’t ideal, and the basement bedroom smelled musty, but I had to see the yard. The house had an enclosed garden with a pool, and the owner mentioned that they had to buy two rows of vines from the vineyard next door in order to get enough land to put in the pool. She also walked her dog in the vineyards, and took us through a small loop to see what the experience was like. I could imagine Phoebe enjoying going for a stroll offleash, and wondered if this could work for us. 

It was the last of our houses to see on this trip, and while I was by no means convinced, it was perhaps the best fit of the four. I tried to remind myself that it was still very early in the search, and not to feel dejected that none of these places were “the one.” After all, I’d learned so much over the last few days – about the process, the various regions, and the types of houses. That had to serve me well on my next trip, right? But little seeds of doubt started to creep in. Was I being too picky? Would I find something that checked all the boxes? Was it time to start lowering expectations?  

Hmm…